BlackTop MotorCycle Gang

Get Published in 2012

2012-01-05T10:16:00.002-04:00

Getting published could be the hardest thing you’ll ever do—or the easiest. Get Published in 2012 prepares you to search for publishers or agents the right way, without wasting time. You’ll learn how to identify and contact the right publishers for your work (fiction or non-fiction); how to prepare a publishing toolkit, including a publisher tracking sheet, long and short synopses, query and covering letters, author bio and publication history (even if you don’t already have anything published). You’ll learn how to prepare a marketing plan for those publishers who demand them in the submission process. You’ll also learn how to receive free critiques of your work, how to deal with rejection and how to avoid scams. We’ll look at traditional forms of publishing, self-publishing and electronic publishing.

Everyone will also receive a free copy of eMarketing Tools for Writers, 3rd Edition.

Instructor: Biff Mitchell

Date: Saturday, January14

Time: 10 AM till 4:30 PM (with a one hour break at noon)

Place: Studio4Ward, 384 Queen Street (across from City Hall)

Workshop Fee: $60

To enroll or learn more, call 455-BIFF (2433) or email biff@biffmitchell.com.

Jo Griffith reading, Odd Sundays at Molly's

2011-11-17T11:56:00.001-04:00

Our very own Jo Griffith will be giving a reading this Sunday at 2 PM at Odd Sundays at Molly's (Molly's Coffee House, 554 Queen Street, across from the Off Square park). Let's go there and support her. There will be an Open Mic after the reading, so bring something to read, or sing.

Robbie in Fredericton

2011-08-23T17:10:00.003-03:00

BTMG member Robbie Burns to be back in the Fredericton limelight in a little o're twa weeks.

What's the BTMG to to do now to celebrate Robbie restored to 'is place on The Green beside the Saint John River?

Join the parade? A pre-emptive reading raid? A post-parade reading? O, what shall we do for and with Robbie?

Three cheers for Robbie!

Vivat!
Vivat!
Vivat!

BTMG Pride

2011-07-30T06:23:00.002-03:00

Yes, folks, the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang has pride and is proud to show it, to show and lend support to Fredericton Pride.

Today, we'll "reading raid" the Alt ♥ Art Market in the Charlotte Street Arts Centre Auditorium, 732 Charlotte St, Fredericton, NB.

Come buy art, crafts & books. Vendors will be donating a percentage of their sales to Fredericton Pride. Admission to this fundraising event is by donation. Be there and don't be square, be queer. Artmaking and writing are queer activity, outside heteronormative assumptions and other numbing, normalizing norms. "Reading raids" are outside the norm, too. Come support and show your Fredericton Pride!

rumblings ...

2011-05-15T06:43:00.002-03:00

two BlackToppers in Sussex, NB
Friday night, 13 May 2011
Beth Powning and Joe Blades
@ the Artist Co-op Tea Room
Maple Street @ the train crossing
fire station nextdoor

Boston Jonson in Murder by Coffee

2011-04-13T16:37:00.003-03:00

When a nasty little plague of people turning into stone in coffee shops around the city threatens the bottom line of the Coffee Cartels and their highly addictive designer coffees, investigative consultant, Boston Jonson, is tossed into a world where everyone is out to either admire him or kill him, a world of annoying weirdoes who are probably better off turned into stone.

Excerpt:
It was a bustling place, crowded by late-night coffee swillers with throats like pipelines running high octane caffeine, but somehow they found a way to talk through the flow of java and they were all talking at the same time, drowning out the re-mixed jazz tunes from musicians who were mostly dried bones, which was mostly a good thing since they couldn’t hear what the late 21st Century had done to their music. He guessed that most of the crowd were college students, meeting here with their holotops to work in groups on assignments from professors they’d never met in real life, eProfs who appeared as talking heads on their students’ computers. The rest of the crowd looked like artists, writers and musicians who thought the digitally squeezed music actually said something. And then there were the coffee shop spooks, the ones who sat night after night guzzling into the wee hours because that’s what they did. A few of them read books-print books, with paper pages.

Boston Jonson was looking at one of them now. She was a heavy woman, at least two hundred pounds, bent forward on a coffee high, book in one hand, the other grasping a porcelain cup between a massive thumb and index finger. She had that look of intensity that comes from reading too much, living in a world constructed by everybody but herself. And a connoisseur obviously-the print book in her plump hand was a hard bound with a glossy cover. They were rare. Most people used ereaders and holotops for interactive reading. She had a withdrawn intellectual aura, ragged clothing, and brush-lonely hair. Her skin was white. Pure white. White face. White neck. White hands. White enough to be dead. Not surprising though.

She was dead.

She’d turned into stone, white stone. Her hair, eyelashes and nails seemed normal. He ran is fingers over her forehead-smooth stone. He knocked lightly on her forehead-hard white stone. People strolled by on the other side of the floor-to-ceiling windows peering curiously at the guy with the shoulder length tangerine hair and Hawaiian hula hula shirt knocking on the overly white woman’s head.

"She was a regular," said the short good-looking woman standing beside him. "She was here every night." Her name was Julie-not the stiff, the good-looking woman. She was the owner of the Tenth Cup. Brunette hair flowed over her shoulders, stopping just short of some interesting cleavage. She noticed Boston noticing the cleavage and smiled. "Her name was Brandy. She was a librarian."

Librarian, thought Boston. That would explain the print book.

"She didn’t speak much, just drank coffee and read a different book every day." She put a sympathetic hand on Brandy’s shoulder. "We found her like this an hour ago. One of the coffee consultants noticed that she wasn’t turning pages." Julie gave her a wistful look. "She read quickly. She did a lot of page-turning."

"But not anymore, I guess," said Boston with what he hoped was the appropriate amount of inflected regret. He was sure that Brandy had been a good person, coffee addiction, print books, tattered clothing and all. "Did she have any enemies?"

A spark of suspicion ignited for an instant in Julie’s brown eyes and Boston felt her mood chill a degree or two. He had that effect on people. "Just a standard question. I have to ask it."

The chill ducked into a warm place, the smile was back full-faced. "Of course. It’s just, you know, strange... finding a regular customer suddenly turned to stone for no obvious reason. Do you think it was deliberate?"

"I’ve never heard of anyone turning to stone before. It’s too early to even make a guess."

Julie looked at Brandy sadly. "We’re going to miss her around here."

Two women sitting at the table directly behind Brandy’s seemed to be frowning pointedly in Brandy’s direction. Was that animosity in their eyes? "Did you ever notice anyone giving her a hard time, any arguments?"

She pursed her lips, squinted her eyes, trying to remember. "No... no. She was a loner. Kept to herself. When she was here, she drank coffee and read books. She never actually talked to anybody except the coffee consultants and me. I can’t think of anyone doing something like this on purpose." She ran her hand across Brandy’s cheek. "I can’t imagine anyone doing this, period." She looked over at the counter where a dozen people had materialized out of nowhere. She turned back to Boston, put a hand on his arm, smiling, big brown eyes professional but playful. "I really should get back with the girls. This is one of our busy periods."

Boston smiled and nodded and scoped out her ass as she walked back to the counter. Nice sway.

A silver ID bracelet dangled on Brandy’s wrist. He took out his wallet, opened it and tapped it against the bracelet. The screen in his wallet brought up her picture and ID. Brandy Williams. Born April 7, 2034. Occupation: Librarian. That was all. No address. No phone. No email. He snapped a picture of her with his wallet and looked around. No one seemed to be watching him.

It was time. The vibrations surrounding Brandy had a story to tell. That was their way. Everything was vibrations and when vibrations came into contact with each other, they left an indelible impression, a story that could be read of past events if you just opened yourself to their tale. He closed his eyes and relaxed his shoulders. He let his awareness sink slowly into his tan dien, the center of his psychic gravity. He slowed his breathing, letting the air glide through his nostrils and into his lungs, visualizing the energy of the universe flowing in through his head, down through his chest and deep into his stomach. He let the air drift up into his throat and seep out of his mouth as the energy of the earth flowed up his legs and into his stomach. After three breaths, he was in the zone, charged with energy and relaxed. He listened with his inner ear, waiting for the vibrations to speak to him about Brandy.

As usual, the vibrations said nothing. Somebody else did the talking.

"She was a pain in the ass." Surfacing back into the world, Boston focused his eyes on a woman with blond-streaked brunette hair with bouncy curls cascading down to her shoulders. Wide, dark-rimmed glasses gave her an air of smart and sharp. She was a knockout. "She was disruptive," she said with a sonorous voice that might carry to the ends of a large room without jarring a single eardrum. "She got into her books and forgot where she was, reading out loud half the time, and I mean out loud."

"Sometimes she’d yell," said the woman sitting across from her, another beauty with pitch black hair and matching eyes and skin lustrously pale, like something caressed by the moon. "I mean, she’d be reading, lip-mouthing with a low rumble, and then she’d suddenly yell ’NO! YOU DAMN FOOL!’ She made me pour half a cup of coffee into my lap one night."

Availble at: Double Dragon Publishing

BTMG raids Canadian Review of Literature in Performance

2011-02-20T08:08:00.002-04:00

“Introducing the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang” is an article in the first issue of Canadian Review of Literature in Performance is a new web publication out of Montreal.

The launch on Friday night featured an incredible lineup:

LITLIVE Launch Party at Sala Friday

On Friday February 18th join the party as the whole spoken word community comes together for LITLIVE.CA, the first web magazine to document and review the spoken word scene across this country.

The show features music, poetry and vibe from the KalmUnity Vibe Collective (with Katalyst, Fabrice, Deanna Smith and Blackbird)
It’s the fabulous Alexis O’Hara flying in from Europe to perform
It’s Catherine Kidd, Fortner Anderson and the national launch of poetry/trance band Pharmakon MTL’s latest CD To Call Out in the Night

It’s Luna Allison, Kaie Kellough and Throw Collective’s Alessandra Naccarato

Your host and MC for the night is the editor of LITLIVE, poet and CKUT show host
Mr. Vince Tinguely.

It all takes place at the Sala Rossa, 4848 St-Laurent, Montréal
Friday, February 18th
Doors open 8PM; show starts 9PM
$5 (or pay what you can)

LITLIVE.CA is the website for the Canadian Review of Literature in Performance. The magazine features profiles of spoken word artists, interviews, scene reports from across the country, as well as reviews of CDs, DVDs and web-based performance lit projects. LITLIVE.CA is open to your comments.

The launch of LITLIVE.CA is sponsored by the Canada Council for the Arts and CKUT 90.3FM. It is produced by Wired on Words Productions.

New Member: Robert Burns

2010-12-17T07:02:00.003-04:00

Last night, the late, great, poet Robert Burns was voted into the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang. He's been getting into the holiday spirit. BTMG has performed and shared more of his poetry than the writings of some other members of the BTMG. Rabbie Burns has a place in the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang. His day of celebration is coming up next month: 25 January.

Days later the BTMG and Emerge Artist Collective rumble into Saint John for the opening of our re:myth exhibit in the City of Saint John Gallery @ 20 Hazen Avenue on Friday, 28 January.

And more secrets...shhh!

2010-11-14T11:29:00.002-04:00

“BlackTop MotorCycle Gang: By far the hipp(i)est gang in town, BlackTop consists of more than 30 local writers who stage random, often unannounced, poetry and prose readings throughout Freddy. Admission to the clan is highly exclusive and granted only upon being dubbed weird enough by two current members. www.btmgang.blogspot.com.”

Thursday, October 14th, 2010, HERE NB

art exhibit opening Friday, 12 Nov

2010-11-12T15:01:00.003-04:00

BLackTop member Rita Sassani has an art exhibit opening at 5 pm, Friday, 12 November 2010 in the Charlotte Glencross Gallery, Charlott Street Art Center, 732 Charlotte Street, Fredericton.

re:myth poster

2010-08-27T06:30:00.000-03:00

Artists and Writers Make New Myths Together

2010-08-18T07:02:00.001-03:00

August 15, 2010
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

What happens when a group of artists joins forces with a group of writers to figure out what myths define life in the 21st Century? The answer is coming this September, when re:myth will be on display for three weeks at Gallery ConneXion.

It started with an idea from Amanda Saulnier, artist and spokesperson for Fredericton’s Emerge Artists Collective. “The idea came to me in an Emerge brainstorming session,” said Ms. Saulnier. “We’ve never collaborated outside of our group and I thought we needed to branch out. Fredericton has a thriving artistic community, but rarely do we work together to create something like this multidisciplinary exhibition.”

Amanda, contacted Fredericton’s notorious writers’ collective, the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang (BTMG), and the fun began. Thirteen members of the BTMG wrote 16 pieces on what they felt were the new mythologies of the 21st Century, from consumer branding gods to re-enlightened Buddhas. The writers ranged from aspiring amateurs to locally and internationally acclaimed writers like Beth Powning. The pieces ranged from traditional poetry to experimental fiction and even a story told in Twitter tweets.

“I was amazed and instantly enthused when I first heard the idea in January of this year,” said Joe Blades. “I immediately wrote to my fellow poetic hog riders and tarmac bums in the BTMG to get their responses.

“We were told to write whatever we wanted, in whatever style we wanted,” said BTMG member Biff Mitchell. “Some members wrote more than one piece … and still wanted to write more.”

A similar thing happened with the Emerge artists. “The response was overwhelming,” said Amanda. “Some of the artists were asking for more pieces from the writers.”

Emerge artist, Joss Richer said, “I was rather excited when I heard that my group of artists, Emerge, would be collaborating with members of the Black Top Motorcycle Gang—a group of writers I am quite fond of. I was assigned two writings to respond to. To this day, I do not know the author of each submission. I could have found out already, but decided that I would wait as long as possible before satisfying my curiosity. Above all, I wanted my response to be based on the writings alone, and not on my knowledge of the personality of the authors.”

During a BTMG reading last winter at Gallery ConneXion, one of the writers announced the project and mentioned they were looking for a gallery to exhibit the show. Meredith Snider, curator of the gallery immediately called out, “Have your show here!”

“This collaboration between the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang and Emerge is a wonderful example of exchange and dialogue between artists,” said Ms. Snider. “I’m really looking forward to seeing this exhibition and encourage others to come out to the opening reception to see the work and speak with the artists.”

BTMG member Andrea Kikuchi, after struggling for months with writer’s block, was inspired by the project. “I was immediately excited and felt the inspiration I haven't felt in months flow back. I decided to finish the story and submit it, anxious to see how the artists will interpret it,” said Ms Kikuchi. “I am so grateful to be a part of this original concept. It promotes a new wave of creativity that bridges all forms of art and continues to inspire us all.”

“I look forward to seeing all the work and the artists in the same space,” said Ms. Saulnier. “It will be interesting to see how the writers respond to the visual work. This truly is the beginning of a dialogue that I hope will continue in the future.

The re:myth exhibition will open on September 2 at 7:00 PM in Gallery ConneXion’s 1922 Gallery, 440 York Street (in the Chestnut Complex), Fredericton, NB. There will be opening remarks and readings from members of the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang.

—30—

Contacts:

Amanda Saulnier
Email: chocolattelos@gmail.com

Joe Blades
Phone: 506.454.5127
Email: joeblades@nb.aibn.com

Biff Mitchell
Phone: 506.455.2433
Email: biff@biffmitchell.com

BACKGROUND

Emerge Artists Collective
Our aim is to increase the exposure of emerging artists and craftspeople. Through shared knowledge and experience, we develop an awareness of the exhibition process and its intricacies. We strive to ease the transition between the creation of the work of art and its exhibition to the art community and the public. Our collective counts a dozen members. Our work is eclectic, sometimes edgy; our focus is on non-traditional approaches to art. Our work includes drawing, painting, sculpture, metal and clay work, collage and assemblage, fabric, photography, video and music, and more. Since its inception in 2004, Emerge has held thirteen exhibitions in various locales around New Brunswick.

BlackTop MotorCycle Gang
BlackTop MotorCycle Gang is a collective of eclectic writers who stage spontaneous “reading raids” in various locations and are frequently invited to appear at special events of a literary nature. There are currently 39 members spread from coast to coast. Membership is open only those considered weird enough by any two current members.

Gallery ConneXion
Gallery ConneXion is Fredericton’s only artist-run center, located in the capital city of New Brunswick, Canada. From its inception in 1984, Gallery ConneXion has supported politically and socially engaged art through a range of programming initiatives such as exhibitions, performances, special projects, and workshops. Gallery ConneXion promotes contemporary Canadian and international artists, emerging and established, from diverse cultural backgrounds. The gallery programs exhibitions, artist residencies, fundraising events, music shows, video screenings, performances, readings, membership exhibitions and activities. Gallery ConneXion is a not-for-profit organization with charitable status. It receives operating funds from the Canada Council for the Arts and the Province of New Brunswick. Gallery ConneXxion currently has over 50 members from Fredericton and the surrounding region, most of whom are practicing artists.

In a statement from Meredith Snider: “The board, staff and membership of Gallery ConneXion are grateful to the following companies and people for donating their labour and time to renovate the second gallery space this July 2010; Fabinex (carpentry work), Hector Tovar (crack filling), members of the Fredericton Pride Committee (painting). Your contribution to Fredericton's artist-run center is sincerely appreciated.”Gallery Coordinator, Meredith Snider: 506 454-1433, connex@nbnet.nb.ca www.galleryconnexion.ca

Jumpin' Džo on tour in Central Europe

2010-04-04T10:12:00.003-03:00

Joe Blades's Spring 2010 Central European speaking tour

8–10 April, Thur-Sat: a Keynote speaker, with poetry reading, @ the 4th Unconventional Conference of Young Canadianists, North University of Baia Mare, Romania

12 April, Tuesday, 5 pm: poetry reading at Országos Idegennyelvu Könyvtár/National Library of Foreign Literature in Budapest, Hungary

23–24 April: talk and poetry reading @ University of Kragujevac, Srbjia

29-30 April, possibly at Universitet u Istocnom Sarajevu, Pale, Republika Srpska

1–7 May: talk, poetry reading & more @ the Canada Corner at the Filozofski fakultet, University of Banja Luka, Republika Srpska, Bosnia i Herzegovina

11–16 May: poetry readings, including in the National Canadian Poetry feature, of the International Literature Manifestation—Sarajevo Poetry Days/Sarajevski dani poezije, festival, Association of Writers Bosnia and Herzegovina

Fredericton Small Press Fair 20 March 2010

2010-03-20T07:55:00.003-03:00

Welcome to Spring!!!

Fredericton Small Press Fair including “Neustro Espacio” display

20 March 2010

Doors open at 12 noon!

In association with World Poetry Day (21 March) and the 10th International Multicultural-Multilingual Poetry Reading and Poster Poem Exhibition, organized and founded by Nela Rio.

Sponsors include Ashes, Paper & Beans: Fredericton’s Writing & Art Show, Broken Jaw Press, Capítulo de Fredericton de la Academia Iberoamericana de Poesía, and revue ellipse mag . . .

• Exhibitors • Readings • Workshop(s) •
BlackTop MotorCycle Gang
Broken Jaw Press
Gallery ConneXion
Goose Lane Editions
Alice Guergis
NaNoWriMo Fredericton
Phoebe Tsang, poet
Qwerty magazine
Random Paper & Fabric
revue ellipse mag
Translation Live! workshop:
Translating Sound into Poetry
and more …

5–8 pm, The 10th International Multicultural–Multilingual Poetry Reading & Poster Poem Exhibition
(86 poetas de 23 países)
In conjunction with the United Nation’s Dialogue Among Civilizations Through
Poetry, Mother Language Day & World Poetry Day
Nela Rio, Founder and Organizer

Location: Gallery ConneXion, 440 York St, Fredericton, NB.

Open Mic and scheduled readings may be recorded for broadcast on Ashes, Paper & Beans: Fredericton’s Writing & Art Show on CHSR 97.9 FM.

Exhibitor fees (including HST): tables $10 (full tables only). Payable to: BS Poetry Society, Box 596 Stn A, Fredericton NB E3B 5A6. Doors open @ 11 AM for exhibitor setup. Contact (506) 454-5127, joeblades@nb.aibn.com to reserve tables and readings.

2010-01-17T16:31:00.005-04:00

Cogratulations!

Peter Powning has posted two segments of Beth Powning reading from The Sea Captain's Wife (Random House) to 500 enthusiasts in Sussex, NB this past Friday evening, this is the second.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9l2MF3Cr1Y

Rigging courtesy Kings Landing Historical Settlement.

Blades is a poet and he knows it

2009-10-08T09:23:00.001-03:00

By ALEXANDRA DAVIS
davis.alexandra@dailygleaner.com

Don't be surprised if Joe Blades recites a poem to you this week as you pass him on the street . . .

NONYMOUS Three has arrived

2009-04-05T11:11:00.000-03:00

BlackTop MotorCycle Gang raids Nonymous

2009-04-04T09:38:00.001-03:00

As the rumble faded away in the distance, in the direction of the nearest watering hole, a dazed, small man, with black powder smeared on his face, pulled himself upright out of a mess of crumpled boxes, strewn paper, and overturned furniture than had been his office. He swayed on his feet and with sandbagged eyes surveyed the damage and sighed.

He knew they'd come back for him. They'd make him do horrible things: drink in public; make a fool of himself; make he read aloud words that would curl the petals of flowers and make loved ones howl and scream in the night. There would be another BlackTop MotorCycle Gang night of mayhem on the spring rain-soaked streets of Freddy Beach.

He heaved his desk upright and found a not too broken but decidedly wobbly chair in which to sit. He hears sounds, a whirring and phut phut phut repeating over and over. He smiled. It wasn't from outside the office window with a cardboard panel from a wine box taped over a hold punched there during the last raid. No, the sound came through the wall from an inner room. Micha picked his way across the ruined office, careful to avoid daggers of shattered mirror on the floor outside the kitchenette and now doorless toilet.

The door had been ripped of its hinges and kicked to pieces, panels of wood flying, in front of him. The bald badass reaking of beer and candied cigarillos that had held him tight almost whispered as he'd said, "We'll do to that to you, if you don't cooperate." Micha had nodded his head and gulped out, "Okay. Sure. Whatever you say."

Now Micha took the lid off the toilet tank, reached a hand in and pulled out a key. In the hallway opposite the toilet was a half height steel door with curled decals warning DO NOT ENTER in bold letters above the lightning bolt and HIGH VOLTAGE below. Opening the door, he stooped and squat-walked two steps in then stood up.

It was a small, windowless room with a fan in the outside wall above a bank of grey equipment with flickering green and red LED lights. The right end was busily moving up and down like it was doing something. Micha reached over, pulled out a stack of paper. The top sheet read Nonymous Three. He'd done it. He gotten it on paper while they were destroying his office, his life.

He'd be ready, when they returned. Better than WANTED posters at the police station and post office, he'd captured a likeness of the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang in words and pictures. They were loud and rude, sweet and perverse, poets and not-poets, their fukted-up and alive, singin' and spinnin', peelin' rubber and leaving tread all over the place. Tonight they'll be hoggin' the talking stick, raidin' the microphone. They'll be in your face and between your ears . . .

BE THERE OR WEEP:
7 pm, Saturday, 4 April 2009
Wilser's Room
in the Capitol Complex
off Pipers' Lane & Queen St
opposite The Tannery & King St
Fredericton, New Brunswick

Bring money, watches, wallets, piggybanks, your stash,
if you want to give a Nonymous Three a good home
out of the clutches of the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang.

shirt: boothill saloon
loc: broken desk
temp: 8 C
sound: prong "rude awakening"

Nonymous on APB (CHSR)

2009-02-10T18:06:00.003-04:00

Micha of Nonymous mag here in Fredechicken, NB, will be my live guest in the first half of tonight's Ashes, Paper & Beans show, 7–8 pm, on CHSR 97.9 FM (& on the web). Catch us if you can . . .

—Broken Joe

The Night Before Robbie Burns Day

2009-01-24T08:09:00.002-04:00

You don't have to be Scottish

Saturday, January 24, 2009 at 7:30pm
(after the BAG and ConneXion exhibition openings @ The Beaverbrook Art Gallery. 703 Queen St)

'Tis the night before Robbie Burns day and all through the world, denizens are partying, rollicking and . . . well, drinking Scotch, eating haggis, reading poetry, dropping down drunk and throwing up.

This is a BlackTop MotorCycle Gang reading raid open to the public. It will start at Biff's place (158 Brunswick Street, Apt 3-C . . . behind the big red brick house with the huge balcony and porch between Smythe and Northumderland . . . Biff's building is around back) with readings from Robbie (for those who want to read . . . find them here,http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=58856568901&h=AzHQG&u=oJuiM), and a good old Scottish chili and other snacks (bringing food is optional). Joe Blades will be bringing haggis (the most delicious haggis in the world and the only haggis I'll ever eat).

We'll meet at 7:30. After drinking (and you can bring whatever you want...for those of you with defective taste buds that won't accept Scotch) we'll head to the Robbie Burns statue on the Green (which is absent at the moment, but Broken Joe is bringing a bust) to read to his ghost.

And then, it's just pure party-your-ass-off.

Double Book Launch in Montreal

2008-11-10T05:36:00.001-04:00

Lanzamiento doble / Double Book Launch

Broken Jaw Press y / and las Ediciones de la Enana Blanca
los invitan a celebrar la publicación de / invite you to celebrate the publication of

Aquella luz, la que estremece / The Light That Makes Us Tremble
poemas de / poems by Nela Rio
traducido por / translated by Hugh Hazelton
(Broken Jaw Press y Ediciones de la Enana Blanca)

y / and

from the book that doesn’t close
poems by Joe Blades
(Broken Jaw Press)

Martes 11 de noviembre de 2008 / Tuesday, 11 November 11 2008
7:00 pm
Café Volver
5604, avenue du Parc
Montreal QC
tel: 514.272.4419

+ / &

12 Novembre 2008, Mercredi / Wednesday

Noches de poesia
1730: lectures débutant à 18h00 jusqu’à 20h00

Le Dépanneur Café
206, rue Bernard Ouest
Montréal QC H2T 2K4
T 514.271.9357
info@ledepanneurcafe.com

Programme : il semble que le Nouveau-Brunswick visite Montréal ce soir!!!
• Herménégilde Chiasson (français) et sa traductrice littéraire
• Jo-Anne Elder (anglais +)
• Nela Rio (espagnol)
• Joe Blades (anglais)
• Sandra Le Couteur (français) musique et poésie.

BTMG celebrates 8:08, 08/08/08

2008-08-08T11:26:00.001-03:00

Tonight:
Wilmot Park gazebo/bandstand, by the wading pool
(please, no eating the children)

8:08

Everyone is invited to read ... your own work, other's work

Weirdness welcome

Madness welcome

If you can't make it, send something to read, it will be read
(especially if it's weird)

Oh, shit!!!

2008-04-25T19:36:00.000-03:00

Hey folks,

A few people have to get up early tomorrow ... so we're starting at
9:30. We'll still be reading for those who can't make till 10. It's in
the alley across from the Pita Pit on York Street. You may be able to
hear us ... or see the candle light. For those who can't make it ...
don't let God near your hamster.

Biffy

btmg reading raids this week ...

2008-03-23T15:43:00.004-03:00

it's gonna be a wild week for the btmg this week with 2 reading raids ... both at memorial hall on the unb campus ... this thursday at 7 and there'll be a poetry slam right after (this one is in conjunction with the artzone "you say potato" project) and one on saturday at 9 as the grand finale of the words of the people 12 hour read-a-thon ... and again, a poetry slam and induction of new members into the gang.

and totally irrelevantly, does anybody know where this door is? it would make a perfect spot for a future reading raid ...

of burns and merriment ... and much Scotch whiskey

2008-01-29T00:09:00.000-04:00

It was a night of angels blushing in deep folding of Scotched embrace ... when Bobbie's words spilled drunkenly o'er the snowy statue's base ...

... reading to Chris as Burns ....

... Burns ... well ... sort of approves ...

... the haggis ... cooked by Broken Joe ... and delicious ...

... our newest member ... Heidi ....

... our official BTMG groupie ... Deanna ..

... and the gang is loose in the streets ... Scotch and all ...

... and n'er was Bobbie happier.

Haggis and whiskey and poems, OH MY!

2008-01-27T10:35:00.001-04:00

Thanks Joe, for the haggis!
Thanks Biff, for the whiskey!
Both kept us warm around the statue of Burns.

What a fabulous night of slurring ye olde Scotsman's words it was!

Reluctant as I was to try the haggis, I was actually delightfully surprised that it tasted so good! I drilled Joe for the exact ingredients before I delved, imagining the legendary sheep stomach, brains, tongue, whatever... but Joe had been kind and only used lamb and liver and oats and spices. Later, he took his box o' haggis to the bar with him and I saw several burly men pawing it into their mouths. That haggis got around.

We finished off the evening with a screening of Borat, accompanied by meatballs and chicken wings and chips and more... thanks to the ever-generous Biff... some of us, however, were snoring merrily on the floor and in a papazan, after a bit too much whiskey.

That reminds me: Welcome to our first official BTMG groupie: Deanna Musgrave~

members!!!

2008-01-26T09:10:00.001-04:00

OLd Skull is back. He got over the "Abandon live all ye who enter here" thang and Hiedi Irvine has been voted into the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang. Welcome! Welcome!

Robbie Burns Day reading raid!

2008-01-25T09:52:00.000-04:00

The next Blacktop Motorcycle Gang reading raid happens today,
Friday, January 25th, Robbie Burns Day,
in commemoration of the poet whiskey-lover.

A pre-raid party will go down at Biff's abode
for gang members and their posse, at 5pm!

Reading will follow at the Burns statue,
Southside riverside, Fredericton Green
'tween the BAG & winter-housed ladies of the fountain.

Bring your flask and your ear for ye olde poesy!

Ho, boys-o-boy, this'll be a crazy one

2007-12-31T07:13:00.000-04:00

How many BlackToppers will raid CHSR
for the New Year's Day episode of
Ashes, Paper & Beans live from 7 to 8 pm?

Biff wants WhiteFreather to cut his hair
live on-air and he's thinking One-Eyed
Josephine might brave the airwaves

No matter how hurtin you might be
from the biggest birthday party
of the year, of the night before

New Year's Day 2008 is the day
the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang
takes over Broken Joe's show

It's time to count yourself in:
time to be heard by the herd;
time to unearth your best words

Eric Gale to appear on Ashes, Paper & Beans

2007-12-07T13:12:00.000-04:00

11 Dec, Tuesday, 7-8 pm

Ashes, Paper & Beans: Fredericton's Writing & Art Show
with producer–host Joe Blades.
CHSR 97.9 FM, Fredericton, NB.

Guest: performing songwriter Eric Gale
(a BlackTop MotorCycle Gang member)
live with guitar!

[Weather and everything else permitting.]

Congratulations, Chris!!!

2007-11-11T09:53:00.000-04:00

Last night, BTMGer Chris Giles was presented the New Brunswick Joy award at the Silver Wave Film Festival. The award has a value of $16,500 comprised of PS Atlantic filmmaking equipment rental services ($10,000) and materials ($500), NB Film cash ($1,500), Kodak Canada film stock ($1,500) and NB Filmmakers' Cooperative equipment and post production facilities ($3,500).

I remember, back in the summer, Biff telling me that he'd been busy helping write a short film script. This was the result: Chris' story, scripted by him and Biff, submitted for this award. Now, as Chris, wearing sunglasses in the bright lights, said at the podium (with Margo Flewelling of NB Film and co-emcee Josh Linton), he has to make a film.

the tortoise and the hare

2007-11-05T09:56:00.000-04:00

One early evening after a terrible storm a silky furred hare ventured
out of his subterranean home. He had been in his hole for many hours
and needed to stretch his anxious legs. Rounding a sage bush he
discovered his friend the tortoise lying on his back with a branch
cracked over his belly.

"My dear friend, let me help you... then we can race! You beat me before but I am better now, more wise," he said to the tortoise, quivering in anticipation.

He flipped the tortoise over and pulled back in alarm, taking in the
tortoise's crushed shell. He twitched, he ticked and he trembled.
His friend was not all the way out of his shell; only the tip of his
beaky nose and his clawed feet protruded.

"Come out, come out of your shell, my friend,” he said, “and we will
race!” The chill of the night swept around them, bring cold tears to
the hare's eyes.

"I cannot," said the tortoise's muffled voice, "for my shell is
cracked, and a shard is pointing at my heart. If I move it will
pierce me, I will die."

"But you must come out and race me. You will die if you don't come
out. Come out," said the hare, "you don't need that shell, you can be
free...! Come and run with me over that hill. See! There is a little
stream, a brook, a lake, some seaweed and snails... come, come, let us
race."

The hare stared deeply into the tortoise’s eyes. "Don't you see it?" he asked.

The tortoise looked over his old adversary's shoulder. He let out his
breath and felt a stab of pain.

"I do, I do see it. I will race you! I will win again, I will be free!"

The hare inhaled the early evening frost and started to run slowly,
"Come, my friend, you must run fast to catch me...!" His tears were frozen on his long lovely hare lashes.

"Come... come..." he breathed.

"I am coming!" said the tortoise, as he stretched his neck out and
pushed his legs free. His heart beat faster as his shell broke his
heart.

"I am coming! I am free, I am coming, I am free..."

And he ran after the hare, with greater speed then he ever demonstrated before.

More at the door!!!

2007-11-04T10:38:00.000-04:00

Welcome!

Eric Gale
Kim Vose Jones

We want to hear your words . . . sung, whispered, spoken . . . burning treadmarks on the road

YAY - WELCOME WEIRDOS!

2007-10-23T19:12:00.000-03:00

WELCOME TO THE FIVE NEW MEMBERS:
Mireille Eagan
Michael Venart
Andrea Crabbe
Chris Giles
Karen Ruet

FROM FIVE ORIGINAL MEMBERS!

So glad you could join us!

What's a Tread?

2007-10-20T09:20:00.000-03:00

Three of the four Tread published for the BlackTop reading raid on 1 Sept @ Fredericton City Hall Square.

In the tradition of rob mclennan's ongoing above/ground press poem broadseet series and the less frequent a little something . . . broadsheets from Broken Jaw Press, some members of the BlackTop have started producing Tread broadsheets to hand out at the gang's "reading raids" and elsewhere.

Each Tread opens to reveal a piece of wordage that you can pin to your wall like a poster. They also have a bio note informing or obscuring the writer-author. They may even have author photos or somesuch representation. Who knows for sure until after they happen and you've been raided . . . :-)

more BlackToppers

2007-10-18T10:43:00.000-03:00

wasn't there . . . where? . . . on the weekend or (?) when it happened but it appears the M+M [Mireille Eagan + Michael Venart] are now in the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang. Here they are captured against the railing in Wi(l)ser's during the 'appy 'our raid that netted Andrea and Karen after another of Broken Joe's Random Acts of Poetry.

raid on the studio of a blacktop motorcyle gang artist

2007-10-15T22:18:00.002-03:00

it was an overcast evening and pre-halloween zombies were howling in the back alleys when when the writing hurts like hell workshop descended on studio4ward to poke around, listen to the sights, hear the colors, smell the contours, and touch the magic of a place of where miracles are born.

words were written and words were recited, and in the end, something happened.

writers took another step towards becoming writers.

from left to right are bill, fiona, jilanna, jolene, judy, ian, and claire. seated is whitefeather, a brilliant crafter, artist, singer, writer and incredibly special person, thinking wonderful thoughts about writer soup, similar to tourist soup (which can trigger recipe searches), but with a little more imagery.

missing from the pic is jenn, but she was there in spirit.

ANOTHER NEW MEMBER

2007-10-15T00:36:00.000-03:00

Good news all - Chris Giles has, upon request by four members of the BTMG, agreed to join us in our verbal reverie.
WELCOME CHRIS!! Get ready to raid and burn up entire towns with words too hot for words.

still working like crazy for odd sunday at molly's

2007-10-14T23:23:00.000-03:00

still working like crazy on "one-eyed josephine is on the loose tonight" for the reading raid at molly's this sunday ... oct 21.

in fact, i even have a special shirt for the occasion ... my "one-eyed josephine blacktop motorcyle gang reading raid on odd sunday's at molly's madness shirt" ... here's what it looks like ...

after the reading, i'm giving it away, buttons and all ...

btw, i may need to borrow a skirt and a big purse from somebody ... not for anything weird ... well, yeah, for something weird ...

reading raid at studio4ward

2007-10-14T18:32:00.000-03:00

it was a fiercely non-stormy day about to break with rain and fire four when members of the blacktop motorcycle gang converged on studio4ward for a reading raid

the audience was aghast

but the raid was a rave

don't miss the pandemonium and havoc next sunday when odd sundays at molly's features the blacktop motorcycle gang

Hide yer children and loved ones!!!

2007-10-10T19:19:00.000-03:00

the gang grows!

2007-10-05T21:59:00.000-03:00

The gods were laughing today as they watched mortals trying so damn hard to be happy in the hours before un- took over. They shook the earth. Mmembers of the Blacktop MotorCycle Gang had to swerve around or jump widening cracks in the roadways as two new members landed in their midst:

Andrea Crabbe, seen here with BTMGer and blogmistress WhiteFeather, is one of the new gangsters.

Earlier today, at Gallery Connexion, Karen Ruet was a willing listener for a Random Act of Poetry (not to be confused with a BTMG "reading raid") by BTMGer Broken Joe. Tonight, absent though she was, Karen became a Blacktop.

A hearty welcome and clinking of glasses ensued before the merry band headed out lookin' for adventure . . .

yr. invited

2007-09-19T19:20:00.001-03:00

SURGE! 4.2

Friday, September 21st, 7pm
384 Queen St. (upstairs)

Open Studio exhibition of works in progress by:

Studio4Ward
Karen Casey Photography
Mazerolle Gallery

Poetry Reading by UNB Writer in Residence:

Patricia Young

Musical Performances by:

John Born (laptop beats and loops)

Counting on Downstairs (drone)
[Mireille Eagan
Chris Giles
Eric Hill
Michael Venart]

Event is a fundraiser for the Fredericton Sexual Assault Crisis Centre

Admission by Donation

biff's poem for the nude dude reading raid

2007-09-10T23:52:00.000-03:00

(I call this a planned spontaneous outburst of powerful frustration.)

fuck this – fuck that
an ode to 21st century post-digital semi-robotic Facebook-coital existential confusion

fuck this
fuck that
screw this
screw that
to hell with this
to hell with that
down with this
down with that
im through with this
im through with that
ive had it with this
ive had it with that
im leaving this
im leaving that
im pissed at this
im pissed at that
im bored with this
im bored with that
im tired of this
im tired of that
now listen to this
its tit for tat
this game is screwy
its all kablooey
so how about you
have you had it too
it’s all so plastic
I’m feeling drastic
I want to hit something
I want to smash something
I want to demolish something
I want to strike out
I want to
I want to
I want to
I don’t know what
I want to
O fuck
what the hell am i saying
whats this shit im braying
whats this thing im feeling
like the skin on my soul is peeling
and under it all
another wall
theres nowhere to go
nowhere too low
to hide from this thing
im trapped in this
im trapped in that
I cant get out
im going shout
im starting to doubt
I think I’ll pout
What’s it all about
My head’s on wrong
I’ve lost my dong
It fell right off
And now I cant boff
But that’s ok
I wasn’t using it anyway
But that’s neither here nor there
This is the existential snare
You don’t know what it’s all about
You have to invent it every day
Choose your daily lifetime route
Cause you’re the only one who has the say
No gods to blame, no destined path
And if by chance you stray away
Away from what, there’s nothing there
It’s up to you, it’s just your ass
That catches fire and pulls you down
You fucking clown
Into the fire
That sacrificial pyre
That burns away reason
And turns to treason
Against everything that rhymes
So fuck the meter
And fuck the rhyme
And fuck these times
And TV
And Facebook
And MSN
and radio
And the top ten
And the bottom ten
And the top fifty
And donuts
Let’s consider the donut
A hole surrounded yummy
Almost like a vagina
Only not as yummy
Eat the hole
Swallow it whole
It’s low in fat
But fat tastes good
Like real food should
But it’s out to kill ya
But it’s sooooo good
So what the fuck
You only live once
Take a big bite outta spite
cause the fuckers who make the rules
are a bunch of simpering fools
who don’t know their asses
from
ha ha you thought I was going to say
hole in the ground
I was
But I forgot
So fuck you
And fuck me
And fuck him
And fuck her
And fuck them
And fuck those
And fuck these
And fuck the status
And fuck the quo
And fuck this shirt I’m wearing
And fuck these crocks on my feet
And fuck the bile in all our stomachs
And fuck the smell of our feet
And fuck the sweat on our backs
And fuck the tattoo we always wanted
And fuck Barney
Oh yeah, fuck the purple dinosaur
He’s eating your kids’ brains and
There’s no mercy when you’re on a fuck rant
There’s no I can
There’s no I can’t
There’s only you, you fucking fool
Making life bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit
And what does this mean
I think I just fucked my spleen
But what the fuck
My life is mine
Your life is yours
My fate is mine
Your fate is yours
My path is mine
Your path is yours
And if by chance we should meet and have a beer
Lift our glasses and sing out a cheer
And drink till our senses go … doink … in the night
Scream songs of joy and have a bloody fight
Stomp our feet in a banshee dance
Howl at the moon for an earth mother glance
And fall in the gutter and swallow the clutter
I just want you to know
How I feel about this
It’ll never happen
It’s too fucking late
The beer’s gone flat and the fists are packin’ hate
The moon goddess turns her back in disgust
The songs of joy are blood and rust
There’s no comfort here
No song of cheer
So
Fuck this
And fuck that

(Yes ... yes ... the formatting is fucked ... I know that ...)

reading raid on the nude dude's turf

2007-09-10T22:51:00.000-03:00

this is the nude dude ...

he keeps bad things from happening to freddie beach ... or maybe it's the other way around ... across the street from him, there's a webcam that announces the dude's nudeness to the world 24/ ... perfect place for a blacktop motorcycle gang Reading raid with ...

whitefeather and ...

old skull and ...

the angry john and ...

broken joe and ...

biff

and then we all took our clothes off and mooned the dude

and backStreet eric

and the audience

at least ... the others did. I didn't. And whitefeather didn't. And I guess the angry john didn't ... oh yeah, old skull didn't ... and ... hmm ... come to think of it ... broken joe didn't

but I think backstreet eric did ... from the second floor of the building across the street

and ... I just remembered ... the audience mooned us ... yes, they did ... bad, bad audience

ALERT: Gang members on the road!

2007-08-28T18:04:00.000-03:00

Four members of the BlackTop Mororcycle Gang have been spotted on the streets of Fredwrekton. They are believed to be converging on CHSR 97.9 FM http://www.unb.ca/chsr to take over the airwaves at 7 pm. The happy hour staff at Windsor Castle Bar are completly unaware that they are also being targeted by the gang after the BTMG have laid waste to another episode of Ashes, Paper & Beans.

Listen up or be there!

2007-08-26T09:10:00.000-03:00

rumours abound that something
unexpected and artsy might happen
@ this potential site: aerial view

no, not drive-by poetry
though members of the blacktop
motorcycle gang might be inclined

might happen in front of city hall
near freddie the nude dude fountain
at high noon the next two saturdays

no, not the spanish inquisition
though "nobody expects . . ."
is a pretty good guess ;-)

it might involve live poets
caught on security cameras
and the unsuspecting public

it might be a reading raid

WhiteFeather in the FAA Casemate

2007-07-24T21:23:00.000-03:00

Hey! If you've not been keeping' up on things, or think that summer [What a . . . !] is all about vacations in lalaland, think again. This week, until 5 pm Friday, the extraordinary WhiteFeather is in artist residency in the FAA casemate (in the gdn fl of the Soldr Brks bldg opposite the carafe college [ha!] on Queen St, F'top [wha' Tourism fred. labels the "historic garrison district". Her co-resident this week, 21-27 Julius 2007, is the great painter and more! Deanna Musgrave. They are both part of Studio4ward.

WhiteFeather is waxing journals, drilling teeth, acquiring bones (coyote, deer, seal, beaver, etc.), funerary flowers, and more, and recombining them. Deanna is painting to Germanic operatic renderings of great Chinese poems rich with feeling and fraught with contradiction.

2007-07-16T19:16:00.000-03:00

words
in
throw
the
a i r
When are we next to
to
watch
them
f
a
l
l
eerie
      as
   fireworks

   ?

typewriter on the green is green

2007-07-02T18:54:00.000-03:00

(NOTE: As part of Canada Day celebrations, a group of local artists Painted The Town Red ... well, that was the theme and the works they produced were awesome. Joe Blades spent the day with two of them, sitting on the grass with his typewriter ... yep, typewriter ... and wrote the following poem.)

underneath black paint i added
years ago in another town
manual not electric greenery
on the clover under leafed tree
shadow of canada flag over me
sun and wind and big clouds—
clouds trailing rain not reaching
all the way down to the ground

sterling creek pony rides nearby
trap kids holding parent's hands
walk a short circle inside rope corral
a large red on white sign advising
wash hands after contact with animals
—good idea not often practised
especially as there is a wash station
and so many dogs in holiday crowd

firebird and royal fireworks music
is the stravinsky or handel in the arcs
feathers and maple leaves first layer
on the gessoed sheet of plywood
today's harder canvas for the five
paint the town red commissioned artists
wind shear and rain in a blue wash
makes deanna start to like her painting

the elephant is hidden in dana's
fields of colour layered and layered
more hidden than the stag in blue
glade in third floor studio4ward
hidden as this morning's doe
briefly on gibson trail watching
me on bicycle roll closer to her
before she leaps into tree shadows

faraway bagpipes are playing
likely part of the marshalling
parade—two long lines of people
lining the curbs of half of pointe
sainte-anne drive parade route
for the about to begin green
harmonious with ever-changing
earth creating and recreating

korean drums and percussion
kiwanis bear costume huggers
the town’s largest gideon bible
on a wagon pulled by a horse
chinese dragon dances on road
the pipes and drums approach
deanna steps on her palette
a painted heel for her art

i am sprayed with fine splatter
not from heavy clouds overhead
orange drops off dana’s brush
on poem paper clothing and me
almost mushroom cloud shape
thunderheads on northside and
i’m asked if there are still
bouncy castles or pony rides

red wine in my water bottle
my typewriter not so quiet
on this red and white day
painting with words this town
my red road red word world
charlotte paints a big leaf
green and her older sister
adds small falling light green

more than child interaction
there's parents and audience
watching them and me create
with all that we have available
self portrait smiley cat face
in the otherwise so abstract
reality of coffee cans and
large frozen yogurt pails

paint and more surprise paint
charlotte and janice the able
assistants as a truly promising
raincloud drifts along the river
writing words with the magic
buttons immediate and right there
no erase function on typewriter
x-ed out the only true edit

truly busy crowd now happening
deanna's wish for children
to collaborate has happened
the grey clouds approach
this typer a bouncy thing
never before seen by some
—not an inflated castle
or another island for no

rain still hasn't happened
burnt-out artists in public
marilyn flat-out on grass
dana returns with coffees
bag of grapes by my hand
a love fredericton t-shirt-
wearing challenged younger sister
of someone sits here talking

her father setting off fireworks
from carleton park 10:45 tonight
was in the greened parade earlier
handing out sun-maid raisins
with one way jesus stickers
on every unsuspecting box
followed by police service dog
bear on i can follow the rules

je peux suivre les règles sticker
darth dust devils and lawnmower-
chewn 7 of spades playing card
element(s) wind water fire earth
and the pony wranglers haul out
as the music turns hard country
a little burnt sienna luminosity
meredith approaches across the grass

vocalist calls out "are there
any firefighters in the crowd today?"
answered with a few whoops
as paint splatters across art
water runs down the surface
layer upon layers whooped
and highlighted for the late
late arrival of biff the fanatic

the blacktop motorcycle gang is now 8

2007-06-19T23:08:00.000-03:00

yes. 8. last night joe blades had eric and biff on his radio show "ashes, paper, and beans" and he was assimilated into the blacktop motorcycle gang. joe's the one who did the post card art posted earlier. he writes, photos, publishes, paints, broadcasts, films and lots of other cool stuff. here he is broadcasting ...

his name and links would be at the right of this posting, 'cept I can't seem to figure out how to modify the template. but this will be done and, in the meantime, welcome to the literary blood pack, joe.

When BTMGers Create ... the world shakes

2007-06-10T22:10:00.000-03:00

It was a dark and stormless night when BTMG guy John said, "Ain't nothin' happenin'."

"'Cause we ain't makin' it happen," growled BTMG guy Old Skull.

"Remember that fuckhead's 21st Century balland, I Just Wanna Punch You In The Face?" barked John.

"Fuckin' A!" snarled Old Skull. "Let's create!"

And so the BlackTop MotorCyle Gangists created ...

And then they celebrated.

One Day on the Patio at Wilsers

2007-06-03T22:02:00.000-03:00

So there I was, sitting on the patio at Wilsers on a sunny Saturday afternoon and suddenly I'm surrounded by a member of the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang. I work up the courage to say, "Nice day when it rains beer, eh?" And he immediate countered with a symbolic summary of the ontological proof for the non-existence of intelligence in the human race ...

Seconds later, he and his friend were attacked and devoured by a horde of angry amoebas who were hiding in their beer glasses.

A random Leafs fan made fun of the devourment. After much debate the amoebas devoured him as well.

I checked my glass for one cell threats and quietly finished my beer.

Reading Raids & Dandelion Wine

2007-06-01T15:37:00.000-03:00

If we read from the landing overlooking the food court, security will have an excuse to evict us. If we get a table (maybe with an umbrella) and just stand up one at a time and read, they'll just have to listen. We may have to buy a coffee from Tim's.

And now for Biff's recipe for dandelion wine ...

Wait till the first dandelion blossoms. Second and third are OK, but with successive blossoms, the flowers become increasingly bitter and that bitterness is carried over to the wine, causing the imbiber to become irritable and prone to listening to old Marilyn Manson recordings. Body cutting and facial tattooing may also ensue.

Pick 4 quarts of flowers making sure to get as little of the stem as possible. (BTW, the leaves make a great salad, especially with Italian dressing.)

Add the 4 quarts of flowers to 4 quarts of water in an open container. (Note: Make sure the container is clean and free of Ebola, Lassa Fever and E.coli 0157:H7.) Let the mixture sit for 6 to 7 days. It’s going to smell like death warmed over twice, so put it someplace where it won’t offend guests and loved ones.

After 6 or 7 days, strain the fluid until it’s as clear and free of flower top materials as possible. Cheese cloth or panty hose make great straining materials. You may have to repeat this process two or three times. (Note: Again, make sure everything is clean.)

Now, you should have just under 4 quarts of smelly dandelion liquid. To this, add 4 pounds of honey. For stronger wine, use 2 pounds of honey and 2 pounds of sugar. The taste won’t be a lot different, but you may wake up in a ditch somewhere in Zeeland.

Now, add an ounce of brewer’s yeast. You can buy this at the Bulk Barn or Scoop ‘n Save. If you use anything other than brewer’s yeast, your wine will taste like shit.

Now, add three lemons sliced into quarters. They’ll float around on the top of the liquid.

Let this mixture sit uncovered for 6 or 7 days. It’ll fizz a lot and smell awful at first, but the smell will improve somewhat as the mixture ferments. Scum will form on the surface. Ignore it. Just let the whole thing sit and pop away.

After 6 or 7 days, strain the mixture again, repeatedly, until the mixture is thoroughly clear. It’ll have a golden tint.

Pour it into bottles, but don’t cork or screw the top on until the mixture stops working (i.e., fizzing up). As soon as the fizzing stops, cork or screw top the bottle and let it sit in a cool dark place for at least a month. Three or four months is best.

When you open it, do so over a sink. It may be very bubbly, like Champagne. Don’t worry if it’s not bubbly. Dandelion wine has this weird thing about making up its own mind about whether it will be bubbly or not from year-to-year. Drink with great caution.

Some facts about dandelions:

Dandelions are NOT weeds! They are wild vegetables.

According to the USDA, dandelions are more nutritious than broccoli and spinach.

In Pueblo, Colorado it is illegal to grow dandelions.

Dandelions are helpful medicinally: as a diuretic, to cut fats, to reduce gas, for kidney stones, cancer, diabetes, to cleanse the blood, for weight reduction, for vision, for your skin and acne, for bowel functions, to lower blood pressure and serum cholesterol, and for anemia.

Dandelions may be used in many recipes, for beverages, omelets, salads, juices, gelatins, quiche, soup, pasta dishes, breads, pizza, gravy, dips, spreads, pies, cookies, jelly’s, waffles, fritters, wind, pudding, and even ice cream!

All parts of the dandelion are useable. The leaves for greens, the blossoms for wines and jelly, and the roots for coffee.

2007-05-22T23:30:00.000-03:00

Yes, so when do we launch our first geurilla readings?
I say we hit the mall.

THAT'S RIGHT!

2007-05-22T20:37:00.000-03:00

Congrats everyone on a job EXTREMELY well done with the read-a-thon.

It's a f**kin coup we're commitin...

I am blessed to know and work with such talent, dedication, and get-up-and-give-it! Thanks for being so wicked...

one day i came across a very cool poem ...

2007-05-06T10:24:00.000-03:00

... it was written for folk artist barry colpitts by joe blades ... he liked it so much, he painted it on the side of his house and surrounded it with folk art and joe turned it into a postcard ....

a love supreme (thanks to Coltrane)

2007-05-03T12:13:00.000-03:00


1/        

it's

that weird off-beat again.
catching me

  just

     as i

       sink

         into

              a
              nice,
              steady,
              4/4.            

or...


the slow, foxy grumble
easing out past    the piano

to tweak

my
   unsuspecting ear.


2/

it is whispered (not sung) that

the logic of a
dull man's dance

is born of his decision to dance


   that

        he

     who

       has not felt

                 the dizzy whirl

              of


                                          release

  has not

              been

      whirled.      


3/   

but ooooooooo the

       sudden
    
    turns 

  of 

that love supreme
 

shuck off
the tippity-tap
the bing-bang-boom
the hand hand fingersthumb


somehow, both gone and returned

2007-04-29T18:41:00.000-03:00

I have taken you
so far into me
that the you that stands before me
external
is no longer necessary.

hyperlinked haiku to the grand manan five

2007-04-13T15:28:00.000-03:00

hostages no more
burn the fucker’s damn house down
peace drifts from the smoke

Personals #1

2007-04-11T10:12:00.000-03:00

Reader, 37 years old,
plenty of experience,
looking for a poem of
any age, any size,
the darker the better.

2007-04-11T00:04:00.000-03:00

shit ... i wrote a haiku (i think)

2007-04-08T22:45:00.000-03:00

blacktop stretch away
words fall into my beer glass
another thought drowns

god... mother.

2007-04-04T10:58:00.000-03:00

'anniversary'
when's the last time you had one?
it's a dirty word.

2007-04-04T10:10:00.000-03:00

graffiti words move
sprayed paints dancing in my eyes
raw city council

the i hate haikus haiku

2007-04-02T23:09:00.000-03:00

this thing my 250 pound
psychotic
gay
cat
pico

don't fuck with me

STU or DREW

2007-04-02T18:50:00.000-03:00

Ah. The subtlety of subletting...
Bless you Stu.
Bless you Drew.
Bless your utl. too.

In Sober Meditation

2007-04-02T13:50:00.000-03:00

Damn. Passed out again
in the second washroom stall
head between my knees.

the mystery of the one and the many

2007-04-02T13:00:00.000-03:00

serendipity
is a long word that makes for
a short haiku line

I challenge you to a haiku!

2007-04-02T12:29:00.001-03:00

She felt murderous
Stark early morning screaming
The black tongues of crows.

John had an odd dream this weekend...

2007-04-02T10:37:00.000-03:00

Pickled

Perhaps we are
but pickles in a jar.

Old Skull Speaks

2007-04-02T08:54:00.000-03:00

Confession

blind old flower
here like me

thinks for two
passing poetry as fresh
naked magic

I Am Biff

2007-03-31T21:39:00.000-03:00

Hi, I am Biff. I am so happy to be a part of the BlackTop MotorCycle Gang that I just shit my pants.

Gotta go change now. See you in a reading place soon.

Biff
Silence says it all.

pimp my muffler

2007-03-31T12:11:00.000-03:00

we are these who speak out loud:

Andrew Titus
Jeannine Gallant
Biff Mitchell
WhiteFeather
Eric Hill
Matte Robinson
John Heinstein

listen for us in a town near you!